i changed my entire blog.

he had changed everything i had while he was in control, and i needed it all gone. i needed my old blog gone too.

starting over. scrap everything and start over. 

i feel like that’s going to apply to more than my blog soon. bridhe is restless. he might not say it but i can tell. we’ll be leaving soon. i think i’m too tired to be worried. and maybe i’m even a bit excited. it’s like a holiday or an adventure. 

i just wish it were under better circumstances. 

i sometimes think that i probably would have offed myself by this point if i could find a way to stop caring about other people so fucking much. that certainly would have taken care of all my problems. i can’t though. i have bridhe to think about. and my family. 

i’m tired and i’m sick of being me. 

< small burnt piece of paper tucked into the pages >